Training Tuesday - 2

Yes, I have felt overwhelmed. Quite often, really. I am at a point where health is key, but pounds need to melt away. During the past week, I have researched what to do so that I will BLAST FAT & BUILD MUSCLE. I learned that I am an endomorphic apple! Yes, I am blessed to be round and carry my weight in my middle....like an apple. I have come up with a new training schedule that I hope will BLAST away that belly FAT and at the same time BUILD MUSCLE everywhere. If you are endomorphic and/or an apple, let me know what you do to lose fat and slenderize the apple appearance.

Here is my new workout/training schedule! I plan to follow this for the next six weeks and then re-evaluate my needs.


Tuesday: 
am - HIIT kettlebell workout
pm - sculpting class & spinning class at YMCA

Wednesday:
am - run for 40 minutes or more
pm - weight training

Thursday:
same as Tuesday

Friday:
same as Wednesday

Saturday:
HIIT cardio anytime

Sunday:
active rest 

Monday:
same as Wednesday and Friday


I have it within me, RIGHT NOW, to get me to where I want to be later!

13 in 2013

I am looking forward to this year. I ran my first 5k a few years ago, when I weighed nearly 200 pounds. It was tough, but I did it...and then I didn't run again! A year later, after running had been a lingering thought in the back of my head and I had lost a significant amount of weight, I decided to run again. I'd go out once in a while, sometimes fairly regularly, but I wasn't really diligent. My girls and I ran a powerpuff 5k together and then I ran the Joplin Memorial run. It was great, but again...I quit. I had this, almost constant, internal conversation;

'I wanna be a runner. I am a runner. I can't be a runner. What run shall I do next? I can't, I'm not diligent enough. Good grief, I'm always thinking about running. If I am always thinking about it, I must really want to do it. Why don't I?'

I know, right? Crazy! Well, it is time to get diligent about this running thing that I am diligently pondering. I have officially joined 13 in 2013! I am excited to have made this commitment. I am going to run a variety of 5k races this year...13 of them! I do wish I had gone out on January 1 to break the new year in with a race, but I didn't.  It isn't too late for you to join and it doesn't have to be a 5k. Whatever race you prefer, how about doing 13 of them this year!?

A look back; 2012. A look ahead; 2013.

I smashed 2012, literally! My smash book is nearly complete. I need to get a bunch of pictures printed and added to the book and then it will be done! Yay! 

 

Ahava Genevieve Sheafer

Reflections ~ 2012: girlfriends and Florida (Keegans Grille, Ghirardelli, 4-seater surrey, hot tub hairy-man, Landry's,.....amazing!), I turned 40 and found out that I was going to be a granny (awesome!), I almost lost my husband (so thankful for paramedics and LIFE), HCM Gala, Pennel family vacation at Monkey Island, Grace and Hannah ran their first 5k with me, I ran the Joplin Memorial, my kids went to prom for the first time (thanks to the 'Toddards' :) for their friendship!), we had chickens, summer Olympics, many motorcycle adventures...a NEW motorcycle...caught in a rainstorm on our first ride on the new bike!!!, WHOLE conference, cousins White Cloud weekend, swing dance social with my kids, green smoothies, Rangers football....John broke his hand, Brie threw an amazing shower for Trevor and baby girl, Ahava, Eureka Springs adventure with my man, we celebrated our 18th anniversary....Grammie and Grampie celebrated their 70th!!! I held my firstborn grand-baby, Ahava. I learned to love me, simply for me.

A new year ~ 2013. 
**#13in2013....13 5ks of various kinds - mud runs, memorial run, foam 
   run, color run, night runs, etc. I am excited and I look forward to each of them. 
**Yay for kettlebell workouts! I just received my first kb for Christmas and now I am 
  working to purchase more! I am going to work  hard to firm up using kb and tabata workouts! 
**I'm going to support my disc golfers. Chris and John are both playing in the PDGA World 
  Championship tournament as well as others. Fun excitement!
**Read more, mostly non-fiction books that will encourage and challenge me. 
**Capture our life with pictures. I haven't taken many in the past year or so.
**Listen to the "little" things more diligently, because they are really the big things in life.
**Organize my grocery shopping and be more frugal! 
**Family dinner table more often
** I am going to love me. I am a pretty, cool woman. 2012 was a great year of realizing that 
  and I want it to continue in 2013 

  

tonic Tuesday: "want to"

Tonic: anything invigorating physically, mentally, or morally. Something that lifts the spirits or makes somebody feel better generally.

Something new: tonic Tuesday.

This is my medicine.

I am currently reading Made to Crave by Lysa TerKeurst. It is a wonderful book, given to me by my mama, about satisfying your deepest desire with God, not food. Food has been a source of struggle for as long as I can remember. When I was in jr. high, I went in for my sports physical and I was told, "Jennifer, you have got to lose weight." I weighed 140. I was a bit chubby and I took it serious. By my freshman year in high school I weighed 128. When I became pregnant with my first baby, at 18, I still weighed 128, but that quickly changed. Baby weight piled on...and piled on. I've been obese since the beginning of my baby days, 21 years ago. My weight has ranged from 185 to 215 for most of these years. I am only 5' 4".

In my mind, I always fall back to the must-weigh-less-than-140, but it has been so far away...an impossible task.

I get sad because I'm fat. I eat. I cry because I eat. I get sad because I'm fat. I eat. I cry because I eat.

The cycle goes on and on.

I've been on one diet or another for most of my 17 year marriage to Faithful Husband. In the past year, I've been able to shed over 40 pounds, yet food is still a source of struggle. I eat in secret...can't let Faithful Husband see my unfaithfulness (yet, my body sees and shows it!). I have a few great days and then a binge day. I still cry because I eat.

I am made for more!

I don't need to find my worth in my jeans size or the numbers on the scale!

I am Jennifer Sheafer...I am "that girl" ~ the girl God created me to be. Yes, I am!

The introduction in the book, Made to Crave, is called Finding Your "Want To" and I have found it! I want my soul to be free from the bondage of food and numbers. Do you? Join me in this journey. Each week, I will post a new tonic Tuesday, working through all the chapters of this book. It is blessing me and I know it will bless you, too. May I suggest that you purchase the book for yourself? Mine is like a journal...the pages are written all over, sentences are underlined, paragraphs are in brackets. Lysa TerKeurst, thank you for sharing your journey. God, help me to share mine and find healing in my sharing.

Here is a powerful segment taken from the intro.

'I am made for more than a vicious cycle of eating, gaining, stressing ~ eating, gaining, stressing...I am made to rise up, do battle with my issues and, using the Lord's strength in me, defeat them ~ spiritually, physically, and mentally.'

It is a battle. I am in the fight. I will defeat this cycle...these issues. God bless you as you find your "want to" and join the fight.

My Bathroom ~ My Worship Center

Last night while finishing up my shower, I was listening to a fabulous new CD that my sister burned for me. The title of the CD is Sunny Day Songs. It is full of music that makes me soul smile, my feet frolic, and turns my heart to truth...God's truth about me.

I prayed.

"God, help me to be the girl you created me to be."

He replied.

"You are that girl."

I am so loved by Him. I know that the simple way I live in Him is exactly right for me, for now, in this season. I will keep on keepin' on...continually being molded and created anew.

Yes. I am that girl.

Thankful.

Simply Covered

I grew up in the church. I was surrounded by family and friends who accepted Him, who loved Him, and who believed in His love for them.

I didn't get it.

I believed in Him, loved Him, and believed in His love for me...with conditions (be nice, read your bible enough, pray enough, etc.). I think so human. I forget that His ways aren't like mine. He doesn't think like I do. He is Jesus.

After so many years of self-condemnation; condemnation that I let myself believe was from Him, I finally get it. Well, I at least get part of the puzzle. (and for the many parts that I still struggle to understand, I trust Him to reveal them to me when, and if, it is necessary...until then, I simply trust Him.)

Jesus died for me. His blood covers me.

                            I am righteous because of the blood of Jesus.

I am imperfect, impatient, and sometimes I wallow in the muck.

And then I stand up. I remember who I am. I shut up the condemnation and I talk to God and love Jesus for his covering. I fall in love with Him more every single day. I desire a closer relationship with Him and not because I have to, but because of the great gift of my rightousness.

I believe in Him, love Him, and believe in His love for me. Simple.

Grace for Self

I love to listen to K-Love Christian Radio, 90.7 in Neosho, MO. Early in January, I heard Dr. Meier talking about loving self. Mark 12:31 tells me to ' love God with all that I am and love my neighbor as myself' - there is no commandment greater than these (paraphrase). How easy it is to love God, it is usually pretty easy to love those around me, but oh the struggle of loving self.

We all make mistakes. We are all imperfect.

Most of the time, I am quick to offer grace to those around me when they mess up; when they live imperfectly.

Most of the time, I am quick to offer condemnation to self when I mess up; when I live imperfectly.

How is your relationship with self?

I am determined to love me. I am worth the same grace and mercy I offer to others; the grace and mercy offered to me by God.

You are worth it, too.

Just Be

The following is taken from my 2008 journal:

Jen, learn to love and accept YOU, and your relationships will grow. Don't focus on your negatives, but on your positives. When you focus on the negative, life follows. Don't try to DO for the Lord. He loves and accepts you NOW, today, no matter what you DO or DON'T DO --- Just BE with Him.

I am worth it!

My oldest son, and author of shiningthroughmyownskin.blogspot, posted a message on his blog that made me think about how well I love others compared to how I love me.

I rejoice with others, I mourn with others. I speak truth and I have grace that covers imperfections. I do my best to live with 'no judgment and no condemnation.'

...and then there is me...

I condemn myself for each character flaw and imperfection. I know truth in my heart and yet... that truth is somehow skewed regarding me. I judge, condemn, and choose not to rejoice, mourn, or give grace and mercy to ME.

Yet, to others I say, "Process over perfection."

It is the process I am in. It is the process I am working through. Perfection isn't necessary or even wanted. It is a reality of heaven...not the here and now.

I am worthy of the same grace I give others... and the grace given to me by the Ultimate Grace Giver. Today, I choose to love me; to smile at myself and love being in the process.

Really Living

Today I choose to relax and live loved.

A New Year... A New Me...the process continues

It is 2009! One year ago I was pondering the difficult year I had just gone through. Today I am pondering all that I actually accomplished in 2008.

I attended, and completed, BreakThrough. I began attending a women's group. I read a lot of books...two of them were life changing; The Shack and So You Don't Want to go to Church Anymore. I completed my Life Notebook.

While these things may seem minimal, they are HUGE.

BT began a process of growth and change that is amazing. The women's group is a continuation of that process. The Shack reminded me of the love of Papa God and led me to really know I am accepted by Him. So You Don't Want to go to Church Anymore challenged my thinking about church, about community, and the body of Christ. Both of these books are fiction and they both led me to powerful truths. Completing my Life Notebook has been in the making for over a year. Completing it is a big deal!!

It sounds like 2008 was all about me. Well, maybe it was. I'm worth it.

Reality... the more I do for ME the better I am for my family and the closer our relationships are. Chris and I are growing together and I am learning to be a better Mom. Life is exciting!

2009 is going to be great. I can feel it.

Each day I live, I want to be a day to give the best of me
~ from One Moment in Time by Whitney Houston

Merry Christmas!

Today is Christmas Eve and I am finally feeling excited about Christmas. The ground is covered with a fresh blanket of snow and the sun is shining. What a blessed day. I am celebrating Jesus Christ. How wonderful of a gift. He walked as I do, he was tempted as I am, he overcame... I try. :) I am perfectly imperfect and HE is so very fond of ME! Again, how wonderful a gift.

This year the gifts beneath my tree are scarce, but the gifts of love and life are plentiful. I am among the richest and most blessed!

Merry Christmas to you. I hope that you find joy in this season and that your heart is full.

Grace and Peace!

Journaling Heart

A friend recently made a comment that has me pondering.

"Kids are using facebook to share with the world the things they should be journaling to God."

It is so easy to type out a 'note' or to update our facebook 'status' with exactly what we are feeling... sharing with all who read. I wonder, are the notes and the status updates and the wall posts things that are being prayed about? Or are they just being tossed out there forgetting that God wants to be involved?

I'm guilty of that very thing. It is good to get our thoughts out... to release what is pent up... to confide in friends. It is REALLY good to talk to God about it. I'm all for sharing our hearts with our friends and being real... I just know that for ME... I want to remember to hang out with the Lord... to seek His counsel and His truth. Sometimes, just talking to Him clears up cloudy thoughts. Sometimes, talking to Him releases anger. Sometimes, talking to Him gives vision and purpose. Sometimes, life is big and hard and it takes LOTS of talking to Him to find the smallest piece of peace.

What about you? Where does your journaling heart go with all of its thoughts?

Am I real??? Even here... to the whole world of blog readers?

Yes. I choose to be real... at least here... on my Jumping Puddles-journal space.

It has been a long time since I have blogged. Life is just crazy busy... and, well... just crazy. I am struggling with a hormone imbalance and it is really knocking me flat. Life is a constant spin. I move in slow motion while my insides are rushing. Tears are a constant companion. Frustration and anger are always hovering, trying to overtake me.

I am currently reading Hinds' Feet on High Places by Hannah Hurnard. It is a good book for me in this season. The book takes its title from Habakkuk 3:19, "The Lord God is my strength, and he will make my feet like hinds' feet, and he will make me to walk upon mine high places."

Yes! Amen! I trust Papa... my Lord... to see me through.

Suggestible? Expectation? Hope!

Am I suggestible? Do I accept and act on the suggestions of others? Would it be accurate to say that suggestions could be considered expectations?

I think I have been suggestible.

I think that the suggestions of others are often expectations.

Isn't an expectation a preconceived idea of how things should be done...how 'it' is supposed to be? That sounds like stress; a problem in waiting. It is time to let go of expectations and stop trying to force life into a predetermined mold.

I choose to NOT be suggestible when the suggestion is really an expectation.

As I sit and ponder these things, I realize what I want; have hope for me, not expectation of me.

Hope is non-specific. It gives grace and space...freeing.
Expectation is specific and well defined...controlling.

Today I will choose to have hope for MYSELF and not expectation.

It will be a good day.

How far?

Jesus, you know just how far
The East is from the West
I don’t have to see the man I’ve been
Come rising up in me again
In the arms of your mercy I find rest

Cause you know just how far the East is from the West
From one scarred hand to the other.

Yesterday is over. Today is new.

New mercy...fresh grace...sufficient for ME, for MY TODAY.

I AM NOT, and I DO NOT, have to be who I was yesterday or last month or last year. Everyday I learn more about who I am and everyday I practice being that person... I don't do it perfectly and that is OK.

I am a FREE, VULNERABLE, COURAGEOUS, woman who is SELF-DISCERNING.

How are you?

"I'm not answering that question today."

What a great, bold answer to an all too common question.


Married for 35 years and in the midst of a divorce...

"How are you?"



A best friend dies...

"How are you?"


It is completely understandable to "not answer" that question OR to get frustrated. Is it society...have we all just trained each other that we really don't care? Is it that we just don't want to share our heart...possibly cry or say something "wrong?" Do we want others to "have a brain" and realize how we are without asking?

What's up with "how are you?" Do you really want to know? Do I really want to know?

Yes, I do.

Hey...how are you?